Please find a good job.

One of the best sources of humor in the world (at least for English speakers) is Japanese-to-English translations. All translations run the risk of unintentional comic effect ("Ich bin ein berliner") or public relations fail (the Chevy Nova/"no va"), but there is something about Japanese text when translated literally into English that has a particularly consistent amusement factor. I've played with the idea of having a "Japanese translation of the month" or something in my profile, but it's so trivial that this might be a better place for it. Just don't hold me to the "once a month" thing; I tend to come across translations during Bunny Hopper hunts more than at any other time.

So of course I stumbled upon this during the current Slice of Summer hunt: the notecard that I guess is supposed to explain the concept behind the Crayon Hunt taking place in mid-August. The first half is in Japanese, and here is the English translation:

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hunt Story crayon
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

One day, I love drawing to a white rabbit.
I can not find absolutely favorite crayon.
Ill-tempered black rabbit came there, I did.
"You do love crayon that I concealed. If you want it back, The stylish looking! "
White Rabbit is a journey to find a crayon left in a hurry.

Please give everyone what they want to be important in the rabbit with a white crayon.
Good to help a child who is the treasure hidden in crayons as a reward.
Please find a good job.


Yeah. F'real. Just try to keep from giggling. I think the idea is that a black rabbit stole the white rabbit's favorite crayon, and you're supposed to help him find it. So go ahead and laugh: the evil black/good white thing is far more politically incorrect than a healthy guffaw will ever be anyway.

I imagine that English-to-Japanese translations must be just as hilarious, but we'd have to hear that from a Japanese speaker to know for sure. The languages are just so different that literal translation is simply impossible. Here is the homepage for the Crayon Hunt. Read it if you can, but I just put it through Google translator, and here's what it says we're looking at:

It did not notice on my blog a little cotton, FOTOKONTESUTO of air in this place in a shopping mall's forest planning and sound ^ ^

Planet of Datura in the fashion and fit to raise the SS Location of course Planet of Datura!

Thank you TEKUSU 512X512 size is in square Fill in the following sample application notes A note card and attach the texture FURUPA "Satoshi Inglewood" Please send

The applicant is only a one time
Is the use of props as well OK
Image processing is also OK

Conference Call for July 18 (Sat.) - Sunday, August 2
Popular vote August 8 (Sat) - Friday, August 21
Results Sunday, August 23

So if you're looking for a good fashion photo contest, look no further. I think.

But wait, there's more. There's fun with translation! Take some classic quotes from The Princess Bride:

- You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia." But only slightly less well known is this: "Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line."

- Fezzik, are there rocks ahead?
- If there are, we'll all be dead.
- No more rhymes now, I mean it.
- Anybody want a peanut?


- Inconceivable!
- You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.


- Have fun storming the castle!
- Think it'll work?
- It would take a miracle.


- There is a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. 'Twould be a pity to damage yours.

Put the English through a translator into Japanese. Then copy the new translation and put it back through, from Japanese to English. Our results:


- One of the victims of the classic blunders. The most famous "land war in Asia never to be caught." However, for slightly less well known: "contrary to the line that never died in Sicily."


- Fezzik, the rock?
- If we are all dead.
- Song more than this, I mean it.
- Or peanuts?


- Imagination.
- You are using the word. And it means that I did not think it means.


- Have fun castle rush.
- I think that'll work.
- It takes a miracle.


- A shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You will damage it.

And those are PG quotes. Try it with smut some time.


Since I feel like most of the trivial stuff in this blog will end up going back to hunts, I thought I'd share one of my ensembles of stuff I've picked up from hunts. Everything is a hunt prize except for the shape.

skin - LionSkins (Peace on Earth Hunt)
hair & deely boppers - designs by katey (Passions Hunt - still in progress)
eyes - The Plastik (Slice of Summer Hunt - still in progress)
piercings - Seduction (Scarlet Letter Hunt... they're not too visible in the picture, but they're studs on the chin, upper lip, bridge of the nose, and eyebrows)
dress - Kerryth Tarantal Studio (Through the Looking Glass Hunt)
necklace - *ICED* (Through the Looking Glass Hunt)

Yeah, I'm doing the traditional type of picture and the traditional list now. :P I'm a blog whore!

********

Notes on Camp (not the kind you do for lindens)

As most people who know me are aware, I'm a big grid wide hunter. I've gone a bit overboard this month and need to cut back a bit, but I'll probably always have at least one hunt in progress as long as there's one taking place. I do use a lot of the stuff I find (I'm writing this now wearing a dress from the Bunny Hop, a necklace from Through the Looking Glass, and glasses I bought from a store I landed at on the Scarlet Letter hunt), I love the process of searching, and I even enjoy unpacking (and taking pictures of the results; click the link to my Flickr page at right). I also just like the chance to see a variety of places in SL and see the sorts of stuff the creative people here can put together.

Of course, not every store one lands at on a grid wide hunt is a fine example of virtual architecture or design. Some are dull, some are poorly textured and hard to look around in, and still others make you go, "wtf?" This post is about one of those. This one, to be specific:


This is a store that has shown up in several forms on several hunts I've done. This is just the latest. It's Riki Takaaki's Dreams Gallery (or something like that), which is a Christian store that thankfully gives out secular gifts in the hunts. But unlike other self-described Christian stores that participate in a lot of hunts, like AmberMyst Botanical Designs, Riki's Dreams sells Christian-themed merchandise and displays evangelical propaganda all over the grounds. I know a lot of other secular folks probably get annoyed that a place like this stands between the last hunt stop and the next hunt stop. I did, too, the first time I had to hunt there, but the prize was hard to find and the location at the time was laggy and I had a headache.

As of this last time through (for Through the Looking Glass and Fun in the Sun), however, I love the place and will look forward to when I get to hunt there in the future, and here's why: because Riki's Dreams has become one of the most wonderfully campy stores I've seen in SL. Jesus camp is one of my favorite kinds.

This appreciation for Jesus kitsch began years ago, when I went to my born-again Promise Keeper cousin's wedding. My father and most of his side of the family are Christians of various sorts, so I've been to my share of churches: Catholic, Presbyterian, Congregationalist, "Non-Denominational," and so on. But at this one -- Pentecostal, I think -- the decor was so over-the-top that I had trouble believing it was actually an aesthetic the church members took seriously. Huge, gaudy curtains and tapestries, looming images of Christ, colorful and ostentatious signs shouting bible verses at us.... And apparently they do take it seriously; there was nothing ironic about it. However, I knew this as a potentially campy aesthetic when I saw it. I decided momentarily that even though I'm a heathen, I wanted to become a collector of tacky Jesus art (or "art").

It really was only a momentary decision, though. I was a college student and a hoarder, and between being poor and already having too much stuff to move around, plus the fact that most people wouldn't get the irony, I decided not to do it. Besides, as much as I love camp, there's a problem inherent in it, which is that it's condescending. It's a parody. The use of camp, almost by definition, denigrates some group by satirization. It can be a gentle ribbing or a total slam or someplace in between (or a combination), and it can even be done by a group making light of themselves (think drag queens), but you're basically poking fun by viewing as ironic a symbol that is taken totally seriously in another context.


I hasten to add that I've never failed to take another person's religion seriously; this isn't about making fun of Riki's beliefs but about her taste, and not because she as an individual is a poor judge of appearance but precisely because within the context she's designing from, she probably isn't a poor judge at all. There is an entire aesthetic that emerges from this visually noisy attempt to work the Word of God into pretty much everything. Just visit a few stores listed on this page and you'll get the picture. Some simply sell Bibles and others, sappy, inspirational posters that are neither more nor less cheesy than their secular equivalents, but there are some gems in there, like Heavenly Images, which "creates custom memorial photos for loved ones and pets with Jesus in the picture," and Jesus Laughing, which "features Ralph Kozak's print of Jesus Laughing on witness wear, postcards, and framed prints," the same picture on every single item. Oh, and if you missed it, there's an additional example of Jesus kitsch right there: "witness wear."

The imagery attached to this particular set of denominations of Christianity, I'm sorry, is just begging to be seen as camp. I'm not the only one who thinks so, as the author of the article 20 Tacky Religious Products Guaranteed to Anger God would probably attest. Not all Christian stores give off this camp aesthetic, I should add. The Bedtime Treasures hunt brought me to AngelZ Christian Art just today, and though it was brimming with sap, it was tasteful sap. Christian imagery does not automatically equal tacky, so I'd be interested to understand why so much of it just is and whether purveyors of the tacky stuff are aware that they have no taste or whether they're like collectors of velvet Elvises, who are completely cognizant and enjoy their possessions all the more for their over-the-top-ness.

I am also entertained by the fact that the tacky Jesus art is replicated in SL. I'm not surprised by it; there's plenty of tackiness here, and a lot of it -- like bling and clicking shoes -- even permeates SL's mainstream. But entertained I am and will continue to be, every time a hunt sends me in the direction of Riki's Dreams.